Thursday, January 26, 2012

Fire, Brimstone and... Please Pass The Nuggets

Everyone knows that fast food is not good for you. I know it. You know it. That fat kid down the street may not know it but his overweight, diabetic mother sure as fuck does. But, does this stop us from eating it? Hell no... I love me a nasty, greasy meal from McDonalds, where I can't even pronounce half the shit that's in whatever the hell it is I'm eating!  That is, until I saw what the McNuggets look like PRE-shaping. If you have not seen this image, I add it for you now...

Yes, I know... It looks like a bubblegum soft-serve intestine, but looks can be deceiving! Its basically a chicken slurry, hundreds of carcasses thrown into a blender and squeezed out like toothpaste. Yeah. It's pretty fucking gross... and THAT, ladies and germs, is what is in a McDonalds chicken product.

So, I ask... why do people still eat this shit? And what's more, why do parents despair so when their children, whom they've feed this garbage for years, end up nearly dead in the hospital from health related issues? Anyone? Anyone?

Take, for instance, this story... A young woman, 17, is admitted to the hospital with breathing complications, and after a series of tests, it is learned she suffers from swollen veins and anemia, caused by... DUN DUN DUN... EATING NOTHING BUT CHICKEN FUCKING NUGGETS FOR NEARLY 15 GOD DAMN YEARS!!! Here's the full story... CLICK.

And, the best part? Her mother cries and cries because her daughter's health is in jeopardy due to her poor parenting decisions. "I'm at my wit's end. I'm praying she can be helped before it's too late.
"It breaks my heart to see her eating those damned nuggets, " she said. Yeah, well, you better start picking up those pieces, cause guess what bitch? That's your fault. You are the parent. You make the rules. Her poor health is your fault.

I'm a little bit over parents who boo-hoo their shit ass skills as role models and guides. No one is going to raise your kid for you.

And BEYOND that insanity... I'm from Tennessee. No, that's not the big reveal. The big reveal is WHY THE FUCK CAN'T THE LEGISLATORS OF MY STATE PULL THEIR COLLECTIVE HEAD OUT OF THEIR COLLECTIVE ASS? Seriously.

Like Mr. Stacey Campfield, the bigoted zealot who pushes more intolerance than a crack dealer does, well... CRACK! He's the tit-bag behind the "Don't Say Gay Bill" that's creeping its way through the Tennessee legislature. Crazy, right? This guy is like the George Jung of hate, fear-mongering and small penises. This guy is "walk through the glass door because you didn't know it was closed" stupid. Check out the full article HERE but below, a few choice samples from his most recent diatribe on Michelangelo Signorile's show... plus my responses.

 Homosexuality in schools: "[Homosexuals] do not naturally reproduce. It has not been proven that it is nature. It happens in nature, but so does beastiality That does not make it right or something we should be teaching in school."

Right, asshole. Of course bestiality happens in nature... BECAUSE ANIMALS FUCK EACH OTHER! We teach that in biology! Christ... this guys a fucking rocket scientist. Listen, Stacey (can I call you Lady Name for kicks? Ok... Lady Name) Listen, Lady Name, homosexuality is as natural a process as you sitting down to pee or putting your finger in your butt. It happens through MANY species, yet we are the only ones who deem it necessary to criminalize it, rail against it, and punish it. The kind of nonsense that happens between us, the most advanced species on the planet (that we know of, or think we are at least) doesn't happen ANYWHERE ELSE! So, really. Which is more natural? Me loving a dude or you picking up a 2000 year old chunk of dead tree and proclaiming gays an abomination under your god? Hmm?

AIDS: "Most people realize that AIDS came from the homosexual community -- it was one guy screwing a monkey, if I recall correctly, and then having sex with men. It was an airline pilot, if I recall.

"My understanding is that it is virtually -- not completely, but virtually -- impossible to contract AIDS through heterosexual sex...very rarely [transmitted]."

OK. I get where you are coming from... You had a bad shared needle experience in college and couldn't handle the two-week wait for your HIV test results, right? It left you scared and insecure... Seriously, you freak? Pick up a fucking book someday, or hell. JUST WATCH A MOVIE, since you probably can't be bother with learning to read and all that... might read something you don't like, you know, like HISTORY.  A breakdown:

AIDS came from monkeys in Africa, yes. But NOT from some gay pilot who flew out, fucked one, this stuck his unsheathed dick in every hole between Germany and Pittsburgh. What we know as AIDS has actually been transmitted for MANY years longer, and probably originated from monkey-to-human blood transfer from a bite or cut. Jeez...

And Lady Name, as far as infection goes, if your wife, girlfriend or local prostitute is as lose as you are narrow-minded, then I'd double bag it, since the rate of increased heterosexual exposure to HIV is higher now than ever. F.Y.I. Someone give this guy the Pat Robertson Crusty Dumbassery Award for Excellence in Service to NO ONE!

Sigh... I should probably stop there, before I burst a blood vessel. The point of today's rant is... KNOW YOUR SHIT! You won't make an ass of yourself on national radio or get fat and die from your poor food choices!

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