Failure, or something like it

I am not now, nor have I ever been, a failure.  I am many things, but this is not one of them.

HOWEVER... This does not preclude the fact that I, like so many others, fail. Frequently. Sometimes I fail at small things: keeping up with this blog, cooking eggs, walking (that's a big one, as a have a proclivity for clumsiness.) Other times, it is something much grander, like job interviews or an art project or an idea that could change the face of the world as we know it. Whatever the case may be, I am coming to terms with, accepting, embracing the fact that, hey... guess what? Little known fact: I can't do everything, and more importantly, I can't always win.

Phew... That takes a load off. I swear, sometimes just being honest with yourself is more difficult that getting a cat to maintain eye contact with you for more than a few seconds. I am not a failure, but I DO have a bad habit of letting things go, i.e. my genius ideas. I've heard it said that most people have 3 million dollar ideas in a lifetime.  I'm convinced I've had that many since I woke up this morning, and simply "failed" to recognize, acknowledge, and/or write them down for later reference.

That all being said, I hereby promise to make no more promises about how often I will update this blog. I further promise to make no promises that this blog will even EXIST in a few months. Seems like everyone and their brother is on the blog train. I mean, if Kim Kar-smash-her-face-in could read, I'm sure she'd blog! Or at the very least, hire someone to blog for her and then deny that she relies on a ghost-writer because her marriage was real and they loved each other but he was gay and abusive and I CAN'T GET MARRIED BUT YOU CAN YOU FUCKING JELLO-ASSED SILICON TIT SACK!

That was uncalled for... and only slightly off topic. I'm sure Kim "Sit on a dick" Kardashian is a perfectly lovely, all-natural, GMO free money machine for whatever crappy television company she works for.

My failure pales in comparison to her failure at life and having a soul. Do all dogs go to heaven? I'm not sure... I'll wait til she's dead then summon her on my Ouija board to ask.

See... I do fail at small things ALL the time, like staying on topic.

Check back, if you want. I'm not making any promises, but maybe something funny will come out of my most recent blogging endeavor.  That is all.

Don't Misunderstand a Sucker Punch to the Nuts

Sometimes, on occasion, film critics get so stuck in their role of recommending, warning against, building up and tearing down everything to hit the big (and small) screen, they forget what movies are really for: escape. I mean, I'm all for a good drama, or documentary, something gritty, that'll make me reexamine my values and beliefs and look at the dark, seedy part of my soul, but ultimately, movies are there to entertain, to get away from the hum-drum of daily life, to show us how amazing another life an be, another world, another time or place or person or existence.

In that regard, it can be said that critics often overlook or under-rate movies that don't meet their "standards", and one such film, in my opinion, is Sucker Punch, my personal pick for sleeper hit of the decade. Its visceral, its driving and its so gritty and saturated with beauty that if Photoshop decided to make a movie, it would be this. Seriously, its practically the poster child for graphic art school. However, thanks to lack of vision by nearly every critic in America, this film was heralded as a box office blunder, the messy, awkward wet-dream of writer/director Zack Snyder, who brought such lauded works to the screen as the remake of Dawn of the Dead and Watchmen.

Left to Right: Emily Browning, Vanessa Hudgens, Abbie
Cornish, Jamie Chung, Jena Malone.

The "missing story", as some critics put it, takes place over three different levels of reality.  In the real world,  a young girl is forcibly committed to an asylum by her lecherous step-father following the death of her mother and murder of her sister.  There, she is treated to a lobotomy, which sets in motion the second stage of this movie world: an sub-conscious realm where the girl, called Babydoll, is a new arrival at an upscale brothel.  There, through a series of events, she meets Sweet Pea, the resident bad girl, and Rocket, her younger sister, among others. Having been sold into slavery, it is eventual that Babydoll will take the stage, and her virginity sold to the highest bidder.  What's unexpected is that Babydoll's dancing transports her, and her audience, into a world where she and others are given the tools, skills, and courage to defeat any obstacle standing between them and their freedom.  There, they fight stone Samurai golems, mech robots, and even dragons, in a struggle to locate and use the things that will set them free.

I know what your thinking... some girl dances and fights dragons? Yeah right.  But, the hard reality, that so many critics seem to have missed, is that it just works. The characters are solid, and built from the ground up. Snyder doesn't hide anything from the viewer. What you see is what you get.  Some of the more minor characters may not be given the depth of storytelling some others receive, but Snyder manages to find that subtle balance between sex, action, and story, developing the characters into both unrealistic parodies and sympathetic heroines.  The harsh reality behind the situation these women find themselves in, both in an asylum and as sex slaves, is made less stomach-churning by the flights of fancy where they take matters into their own hands and rise against their captors.

Emily Browning as Babydoll

With incredible action sequences straight out of a graphic novel (only not, as the movie is completely original in concept and design), any lag in plot and direction is remedied by beautifully rendered "other world" sequences where the girls don steampunk-esque attire, fighting off hordes of Nazi zombies, castle invaders and mechanical warriors.  Beyond the engrossing sound design, the movie has a sound track to die for, including covers of Sweet Dreams Are Made of This and Love Is The Drug, both sung by members of the cast, and worked into the story in such a way that you can tell Moulin Rouge was a huge inspiration to Snyder, who said that "In the story, the music is the thing that launches them into these fantasy worlds." It shows, as the orchestrations blend smoothly into each song used to punctuate the scenes. 

If you get a chance, run out and grab the DVD or BluRay copy of this film, particularly the latter, as it contains almost 20 minutes of additional footage that further enhances the story and viewing experience.  While not a perfect movie by any means, Sucker Punch delivers on all levels: Character, story, style and substance.  Its action is super actiony, its drama is super dramatic and its look is something most people would jump at the opportunity to experience in real life. If pretty girls kicking MAJOR ass in highly-stylized worlds of fantasy is your cup of tea, then skip settling for Worlds of Warcraft and grab a copy of this. Against what the critics might want you to think, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Somewhere Something Changed...

Greetings, oh interested bloggies of mine, my faithful followers and symbiotic souls. Today... oh, today, I revisit two very important times in my life in the Time Machine of Music. I take you back to the years 1994 and 1998, four years apart, but four years full of change. In those four years, I was in Tae Kwon Do, my Papaw died, and I entered High School and lost my virginity... so much can change in such a short period of time. That brings us to the first of the days I will visit in this blog in my next edition of the 30 Day Song Challenge.

DAY 06 - A Song That Reminds You of Someplace
Africa by Toto



This song, strange as it may seem, was almost a theme song for my life in High School... at least years 1-3. My then boyfriend and I used it as a song we shared, I would listen to it outside of the theatre at night while waiting for shows to finish... Toto, for some reason, became a huge part of my repertoire. I chose this song, since it reminds me so much of that certain place in my life, where I was mentally and emotionally, and of how much growing up I still had to do. Ahhh... the days when music was good and days were simple.

For further listening...

Brass Monkey by The Beastie Boys



This reminds me of being in my friend's Rachel and Jessica's basement. I miss High School. Lol

I'll Fly With You by Gigi D'Agostonio



This song... reminds me of being in my car, in the freezing cold, windows rolled down, smoking a cigarette, on my way to the club with my best friend Jessica. I miss 18... and ignore the angsty, homemade music video.

DAY 07 - A SONG THAT REMINDS YOU OF A CERTAIN EVENT
As I Lay Me Down by Sophie B. Hawkins (Whaler)



I really wish I could have added the real video for this song, but, alas, it is not available on YouTube in the US. So, this will have to do, because, ultimately, the song is more important.

I first heard this song while I was visiting my Grandparents house. I was watching VH1, something I never did at home because my father always hogged the television... don't get me started on that. ANYWAYS, I was watching VH1 on their old, faux-wood paneled tube set, and this song came on. I immediately knew I loved it, and, with a gift certificate I received from a fellow Tae Kwon Do buddy for my birthday, I had my mother drive me to Sam Goody's, where I purchased my first CD... technically the second, since the year prior I got my first CD from my cousin Larry, a remix album of Mortal Kombat tracks. Love it.

So this song reminds me of being ushered into a new era, where you didn't have to fast forward the tape to hear the next song. It was a beautiful thing.

I'm afraid this post is already long enough, so I shan't bore you with more stories of days past, so I leave you now, on a note not high, but also not too low.

Sad and Missed...

Days Four and Five of the 30 Day Song Challenge on Facebook were truly a challenge for me. Both made me think of parts of my life that were less than savory and people in my life that I love dearly and miss terribly. Its only appropriate that I place these two topics together, not so I can get them out of the way, but so they can be cyclical in their energies... or some shit.

DAY 04 - A SONG THAT MAKES YOU SAD
Full of Grace by Sarah McLachlan



At some point, I think everyone and their brother/sister/cousin/parakeet/diary has listened to a Sarah McLachlan song. Few artists can express the breadth of pain and anguish and soul-wrenching sadness that we as humans can experience as Sarah. For years, she pulled me through breakups and deaths and taunts from peers. The late 90s just wouldn't have been the same without her there to help us mire through the sadness.

Of course, now that I'm more versed in music, I have a wide array of artists and songs that I run to for support in a world that tends to twist me up inside. Here are two of my recent additions to the I Want The World To Stop Mix.

Snow from the Noir OST
No one ever said sad songs had to have lyrics...



When You Were Young by The Killers
And no one said it had to be a slow song...



Missile by IAMX
And the video for this just tears me the fuck up!



Moving on...

So many songs, so little time. I have a song for all of my friends, something that specifically embodies the very spirit of our relationship. Some of these songs are good, some are bad, as are the people I relate them to. But if one thing is certain, this challenge needed a positive, uplifting note, and didn't need to dwell on the negativity surrounding some of my past... friendships. That's why, for this challenge, I chose...

DAY 05 - A SONG THAT MAKES YOU THINK OF SOMEONE
Come What May by Ewan McGreggor and Nicole Kidman (from Moulin Rouge)



My best friend Jessica was a huge part of the shaping of my being. If I had never met her, I'm sure my life would have turned out completely different. She is my friend, my rock, at one point a (ridiculous) bitter enemy, but through all our trials and tribulations, we succeeded in building and maintaining a friendship that few people ever get the chance to experience.

While we were in high school, Moulin Rouge came out and we jumped on that like two baboons fighting over a banana. We memorized the lines, learned the lyrics and eventually performed the shit out of it every time we came within spitting distance of each other... which was basically every day. So this song goes out to her, for helping me become the person I am today, the artist, the friend.

Some of my other choice (or less than choice) selections are...

Am I The One by Beth Hart
Reminds me of The Lady Geneva... miss you.



I Turn To You by Melanie C.
Reminds me of Wendi... I don't miss you.



What songs make you sad, dear reader? Or make you think of that special someone in your life? Do tell!

Hate and Happy

I love almost all music, and if I don't particularly care for a specific genre, then I can usually find something that appeals to my sensibilities. I have lumped two days into one with this post, as I can't allow my hate song to overshadow an entire blog and turn it into a stinky pile of hate poo.

For day number two of the 30 Day Song Challenge, I was tasked to find a song that I hate, and boy... that was easy. I don't care for the rap genre, or hip/hop. I do have a few songs that I enjoy, but they are few and far between, and are generally just covers or reworkings. So, with that in mind, here is my LEAST favorite song, not only because its just plain awful, but because it embodies so much of what I think is wrong with the music industry.

DAY 02 - A SONG I HATE
Hot in Here by Nelly



Excuse me... I have to go scour my ear drums with a Brillo pad.

AND back. My ears stopped bleeding about half an hour ago, but I had to clean up the floor. I was scouring and I slipped and fell. ANYWHO, onto happier subjects.

Day number three was all about a song that makes you happy. This couldn't have been an easier day. Of course, the hardest part was narrowing it down to only ONE song, but seeing as how this is MY blog, I'll post a few extras. But first, the song I chose was...

DAY 03 - A SONG THAT MAKES ME HAPPY
Fireflies by Owl City



Few things make me happier, calmer, more satisfied than all things whimsical. Owl City, one of the great synth-pop artists of the past 5 years, including, but not limited to La Roux, Little Boots, and Lights(notice how many of them start with "L"?) Everything about their music drips saccharin-sweet goodness and light, and it puts me into a smiley, elated place, as opposed to the dark, sinister reality from which I hail. :) It makes me think of dresses made from moss, sleeping under the bright moonlight in a forest surrounded by fairy dust and... and... I'M GOING TO EXPLODE WITH CUTENESS!!!

Below are a few of the other songs that make me happy. What songs make you happy and put you into a good place? Comment below and tell me about it!

Xanadu by Oliva Newton-John and ELO
This is pretty self-explanatory. Xanadu is the best, worst musical-movie ever made, and nothing beats its over-the-top, roller-disco style... or ONJ's amazing 80s fashion choices.



Super Trouper by ABBA
Its ABBA. At a circus. With sweaters... turtle neck sweaters. What more need be said?



Call Your Girlfriend by Robyn
A new favorite happy song. I've kinda fallen in love with Robyn lately. There's just something simple and enjoyable about her music, and most of it is completely drag-ready!

30 Day Song Challenge... FIGHT!

I'm not that much of a Facebook junkie that I can't go a few hours or days without posting something, but I finally bought into the 30 Day Song Challenge. Most of the days are pretty basic... what songs make you happy, sad, do you listen to when you are angry, or remind you of something special. And since you don't get that much space on FB to go through all the reasons why you chose each song, I figured, what the hell?! I have a blog. I'll use it and for the next thirty days (well, give or take a few, as I may not be able to post everything on time... par for the course) I'll post my songs as well as more detailed reasons why I chose them! I'll be sure to link here via my FB every time I post a new song, that way we can keep the loop going.

DAY 01 - MY FAVORITE SONG
Cosmic Love by Florence + The Machine



I should explain. I have MANY favorite songs, and narrowing it down to one song over the course of my entire life would take far too much time than this challenge should require. So, I paired it down to the song that A. I have a major obsession with at the moment, and B. appears most often in playlists (sometimes two or three times, so when I shuffle, I get a double song surprise!) and is listed as my most played song on iTunes.

That being said, this song pretty much speaks for itself. Its heavy tribal beats coupled with her almost haunting A-tonal voice is enough to make my brain turn to happy cheese. I can listen to this song, sitting on the subway, laying in bed or walking down the street at four in the morning and transport my mind to a completely different place. It tears at me and I feel like if I can't emote then my body will rip in two and spill my emotion all over the sidewalk. Seriously... its that intense a reaction. Like putting salt on a slug. Needless to say, I listen to it often. So rare it is to find a song that completely fills you to overflowing with feeling that it made the perfect (at the current moment) choice for my favorite song.

I'll be back to this in a year and see where I stand.

There you have it! Day 01 down! Only 29 more to go until Rupaul's Drag Race.. has a WIN-NAH! Ok, not THAT dramatic but still. Check back often as I'll post my current and past day choices as soon as possible. Until then, what's your favorite song? Post a comment here or on my Facebook!

Ta!

A new direction...

Blogging. To so many this word has so many different meanings. For most, it is an interactive diary of sorts, a way to share thoughts, feelings, stories, etc. with the rest of the internet community. For others, its a cash-cow. Seriously. Places like Towleroad and The Awesomer, among MANY others, are not only fun, interactive, and informative, but they also boast advertising and sponsors which, without a doubt, create at least a moderate cash flow to the owners.

Then there are blogs like mine. Blank. Empty. Barren. A mish-mash of indecipherable nonsense ranging from quirky dreams to, well, darker dreams. It seems that my blog has become nothing more than a sporadic dream journal, where none of my true thoughts, feelings, likes, dislikes, or crazy stories come through. I get so downtrodden and lost in my own mire of emotion that my blog reads like a suicide note... and if I want to entertain people, that ain't good.

Now, this isn't to say that my dreams aren't interesting, as I think they shed a bit of light on the disturbing filing cabinet that is my subconscious, but lets face it... they ain't happy and they ain't pretty. They make for good inspiration, but standing alone, are no better a read than a Family Circus cartoon. How many different ways can I tell the same story? That I'm imaginative and incredibly fucked up?

So, from here on, I make a pledge, to, at least once a week, bring you the best of what I scrounge up on the internet, be it photos, videos, articles or just random musings about the world around me. It should make for a fun time. I might throw in a dream or two, but if I'm going to stay optimistic about my new life, then why not start with some optimism in my creativity?

For now, off to work, but I leave you with this. My favorite commercial of the day. This PSA puts humor and intelligence to work in opening the minds of kids to what the arts are all about. GUTEN TAAAAAAAG!!! I would have killed for Raisin Brahms when I was a kid, but I had to settle for Cracklin' Oat Bran. Grrrrr....